In this blogpost you will learn about our RIGHTEOUS Rewards program, and the long & short of how enrolling ultimately gets you cool, free stuff.
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Howdy, Suspects! Let’s begin with three simple questions.
1. Can you picture anything better than repelling into the City Museum and ripping a Monet off the wall to funnel (secretly) into the underground art market?
2. Is there a feeling greater than successfully holding up the Nation Standard Bank & Trust, cracking the safe combination, and loading a pallet of gold bars into a getaway vehicle while eluding Johnny Law?
3. Allow me one more! Can you even fathom a situation superior to smuggling a ton of contraband over unprotected borderlines by illicit biplane, while Interpol’s people try to hunt you down?
Hmmmm.....?
In essence, these are trick questions, because for devotees of the Jerky Cartel, nothing gets the engine revving quite like the blatant breakage of any well-established law. But, even if you answered no, no, and no, to the thought experiments above, Righteous Rewards is still (most definitely) the program for you! Because the one thing remotely close to on par with the thrill and glory of the listed unlawful acts is...
… FREE BEEF JERKY.
I have your attention, I see! Righteous Rewards works like this. You’ve got missions and when you choose to accept them, and complete them, you earn points. Later you flip these points. For more jerky, merchandise, or RF gifts for your gang. The missions themselves are a cinch! For example:
“Purchase Righteous Felon Jerky.” — See you’re doing it anyway! Unless of course you’re stealing our jerky like a tried ‘n’ true outlaw.
“Refer a Friend to Righteous Felon.” —Again, it’s easy; and what could possibly go wrong with this one? Except you accidentally outing yourself as a carrier of culinary contraband to the Flavor Enforcement Agency and doing 5-10 in the state pen. + hard labor? No biggie, they come after you, we make you disappear!
“It’s your birthday! Here’s Righteous Rewards points.” —Dude, this one happens automatically with no action required on your end of any kind. You don’t even have to pick a pocket or get your hands dirty! Your big day arrives and you collect.
Even casual criminals get kick-backs. Regardless of whether you’re a savvy hawk or a laid-back lawbreaker, you earn points every time you re-up your jerky stash, or shout us on Insta or Twitter, see? So as it goes in all law-bending rackets, everybody wins.
Now check it. Here's the hierarchy:
If you can hustle hard enough and work your way up from Gangster In-Training to Cartel Kingpin, you could be selected to lead the entire Righteous Felon Operation. The side-eyed tough with the most points at the end of each month gets to sit on a Craft Jerky throne! We'll even do an exclusive feature on YOU, the criminal carnivore that wears the Cartel crown!
So let's review.
DO missions. (Some of them are passive and convert to points automatically.)
COLLECT points.
GET free jerky, merch, swag, gifts, etc.
ACHIEVE the highest point count for the month and be crowned Kingpin of the Cartel!
REMEMBER:
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